Men In The Massage World Part II

Massage, which throughout history has been a respected healing art, took a dark turn and was at one point commonly secluded to the brothels. Now its medical merits are commonly known. Sports massage is a good example of how more men are getting comfortable learning how to care for their athletic bodies. Men see their favorite professional athletes in the training room with physical therapists, coaches and massage therapists, and suddenly they can allow themselves to let go a little and reach out for some self-care beyond the ice pack and ibuprofen bottle. The more men realize other men are getting massaged, the more likely they are to drop their judgments.As massage therapists, we can only try to teach those in need about the benefits of massage as well as break down the stereotypes so that everyone can enjoy it. For example, perhaps a female client has asked for a male therapist because she thinks she will get a deeper massage. This is very untrue. While some men have larger hands that CAN have a stronger grip, it’s possible they are not giving their “all” because they are afraid of hurting the client. Maybe a male client doesn’t want a female therapist because he is concerned about getting an erection. That could be the same reason some men never get a massage at all. However, with time and practice receiving bodywork from a professional therapist, these men can learn how to receive non-sexual touch in a therapeutic way. They can also come to realize that it is difficult to get or maintain an erection when focusing on deep breathing and opening the muscles and joints. Maybe a female client doesn’t want a male therapist because she was abused in some way by a man and it is difficult for her to move beyond that vulnerability when confronted with such an intimate setting. The same scenario could exist for a man who had been abused.

It’s important for men to consciously work toward neutrality around sex and attraction. It’s a tricky theme, because clients outside of the spa setting seek therapists based on some sort of attraction. It may be because both ride bikes or the therapist has a great sense of humor that makes the client at ease. It could be that they have the same circle of friends or that they are used to seeing each other at the same social venues. Maybe the therapist reminds the client of a favorite aunt or uncle. ASMY student Nicholas Paulsen admits that he prefers getting massage from women, because “Women are looked at more as the nurturing spirit,” says Paulsen. He realizes the challenges for a male therapist, but says that it doesn’t deter him at all. He will rely on the fact that he has loved touching people in a healing way since middle school and realized the clinical benefits throughout his soccer career. He says that after much soul-searching and trial and error through colleges and career choices that he finally came to his place. It was reinforced during an open reiki session in which he also realized his potential as an energetic healer. “I think it takes the right man and the right personality,” Paulsen says. “I’ve got to be more open, more outgoing, more professional, and with good intentions.”

Bettina Freese is an outdoors writer, massage therapist and instructor at ASMY, focusing on the rehabilitation of sports injuries.